What do you think? I've never been there in this lifetime of mine, but I had a dream about being at a place like this, and inside too! There were lots of other people as usual. And as usual, I was very curious about everything so I trailed off on my own away from the crowd and started discovering the nuances of the place. It's so coooool how you can wander around in caverns of ice and snow, but you're room temperature, you just get the soft glow of cool off the ice. It's so interesting how dreams can resemble reality, but I can't say dejavu because I've never seen it that way before. I remember seeing it in my dream, and I know, when I looked through some pictures of the Archtic, I was most definitely reminded of these dreams. You know how when you see something again, it vividly brings back the first moment you saw it? Well that's what it feels like. I've never been there in this lifetime, but when I looked at those pictures I knew I had been there. And I had, in my dreams. I had a few of them dreams...strange stuff...
I'll delve into it deeper...jump into that cold water...hahahaaa
"tide is high asleep tonight i hear it calling me away… mystical shadows and mythical places cities aflame and a war that we wait for with dread take me back to a long time ago where the sky’s painted black and the ocean i know so well by the light of the fire where we’ll meet with our eyes on each other and our arms stretched to greet the future and hold it at bay with a promise from heaven our children be safe." -by Audio Mainline - Red Ocean
9:33AM 4/13/2015
It's strange what dreams can do to a person. They're sometimes "just too much."
It was about a week and a half ago...I'm almost certain it was April 3 (Friday morning) that I had the dream. Once I had it, I woke up dazed about it, and something in me suggested I write it down. And I'm thinking, write it down? so I don't forget it? I'm having a hard time thinking I could ever forget that dream. No, I don't want to write it down, I don't WANT to remember it, but I know I will anyway. There's just nothing I could do about that one.
So I woke up that day, and I knew somehow that I would experience something that day that had something to do with that dream. And it almost happened immediately upon awakening, and I just knew that this was who I had that dream about (because in your dreams, sometimes the person's face or surface doesn't look like the one in real life, but the characteristics of them are plainly visible). So I was hoping it wasn't that person I had in the dream, but I couldn't fool myself, I knew....he had all the characteristics. Hahahaha. You just can't avoid it. Even if it is something you want...sometimes, the effort to get there is so hard, so delvingly deep, that it feels like it's not worth it. But then you think to yourself....what IS life? Am I to go on and on an on dull like, bored, work and work and work...for nothing? What the am I here for then? Mh? So, obviously, the challenge of facing that situation which you thought was too difficult, suddenly becomes brighter. What other choice is there? Death? Hahaha. No thank you.
And I just heard that character saying, somewhere, that opportunities come and they will quickly pass by. Which is what I've noticed in my life. Makes it easy to avoid getting involved, hahaha! But you can't do that forever, you know. So yea, when an opportunity comes, face it. This is that which may lead you to a more enriched life, growth, happiness. Why huddle in a corner trying to hide when opportunity comes flowing in? Hahaha. That's so hilarious, but so much of us do that. Even though most of us don't have a consciousness that it is an opportunity staring in our face. But some of us do consciously realize just what an opportunity is. After all, we have dreams ahead of time to blare the fact in our self to realize.
The things that you find most challenging in life, eventually hunt you down. There's no avoiding certain challenges. That's why it is taught you to not waste your time on worthless stuff that causes you intentional pain, hahaha, because it's not worth it. When you're faced with some of the challenges you can't flee from, then you're going to get an experience of pain whether you want it or not. And that's the healing ground, or what they call, the 'playing' ground...where you learn new skills, or strengthen old ones. That's where you become alive again, truly alive and living, and that's the step in your life that takes you up higher, closer to the goal of immortality.
12:15PM
But last night, I had a really ugly dream. All about spiders, again! There was a really huge banquet room or hall, super tall ceiling. I was behind a long table with a white cloth over it and lots of food on the table, and my sister Amalia, who passed away March 16 2013 was on the other side of the table and she looked somewhat younger, which is why I called her Amalia, since Molly was only her nickname later in life. There were many other people there. In between us was a HUGE spider web, a circle that reached the top of the ceiling and all the way to the table and from one side of the long table to the other was it round. Perfectly round too, which I noticed. I hadn't noticed it at first because it was invisible to me, but when I saw those really big spiders in rows along the web in front of me, I pulled back because I didn't want them in my face, and that's when I saw the web how round and huge it was, sometimes billowing because of its heaviness.
There were some spiders that had really pretty patterns and colours. The black and white zebra stripes were nice, but their ugly fat bodies, unbalanced, were not. And some of them were almost as big as a fist. They were all around the web. Some in rows next to each other around a circular web out of a pie-portion of the web, while others were scattered here and there on the web, and all different kinds of colours, like beige mixtures with brown.
I stood up out of my chair and backed away from the table, and as I stood there I was wondering how to get to the other side of the table where my sister was, without touching the web. I complained to her from the other side of it saying something to effect of, how the heck am I going to get over there with these spiders everywhere and that web all over the place!? She kind of shrugged her shoulders and was busy with some others there who were getting food from the table. And I just thought that this was so ugly and ridiculous, I decided I was going to have them hire a company to come into the building and spray the entire building, in every crevice, and extra spray! Douse the place!
So it was night time and I was walking down the empty sidewalk. They had sprayed the entire building so it was sopping with insecticide. Then some neighborhood dogs were growling and in a mad rush came at me. One little beagle like dog bit my leg and pulled me down, then a big fat headed dog chomped his big fat deformed face around my upper arm. I yelled at the dog, "in Jesus name let go of my arm!" And then he let go, seeming kind of stupid for having bit me, and just stood there 'duh-duh.' So I realized that the pesticide they used was poison instead of safe for the environment, and that's why the dogs were affected because they were snooping around and inhaled the poison, which turned them into insane crazy dogs. I was really upset that was the case. I went over there and found out that they were using Monsanto's poisonous potion, to which I got really angry now. But that's when I woke up. All because of those damn spiders. I don't know why I have so many dreams of spiders.
One dream, a long time ago was, when I found myself in the dark in the basement, and all around me were large webs with a big spider in each web, and all different kinds of spiders and sizes of them. There were so many webs all stretched out in there that it was like walking through a tight maze to get around them. And I had to move really slowly in order to not touch any of their webs. And they were all like aware of my presence. And it was like....just strange. I don't know how to describe it.
Anyway, last night, Seven was really jealous, I could feel it so strongly through my left ear. I could feel some really super positive vibration through my right ear, and in the meantime, Seven's jealous vibration on the left. So maybe it was him. Because a long time ago, before my two sisters passed away....I had a dream where I saw both Rosy and Molly standing there in a dark room talking to each other and I was on the other side of the room in front of a mirror that covered the entire wall, a really thick mirror. When I touched it, it was like liquid where it made a pulling up and then spread in slow rounds around the area I had touched, and then flattened out again. I was crying and crying. Then I walked past them all and went down a hallway and there was a door open to a room. I walked into it, and when I did, I could feel Seven's presence so strongly. When I got to the middle of the room, he made a ceiling full of spiders on top of spiders, the entire ceiling was a thick wall of spiders, and he made that ceiling to start lowering, thinking to lower it on my head. And I could hear him smiling as I stood there and covered my head with my arms, thinking he was going to just drop it all on me. But he didn't. And they raised all back up to the ceiling, the other door of the room opened and I walked out. I was still crying and crying. I saw this skinny old man who reminded me of Satan, standing against a pole in the room just looking at me as though trying to figure out what I was crying about. There's more to it. But you get the idea of all the spiders all the time. Really ugly. U know? What's with that?
[ 8:20AM 4/16/2015 Oh my goodness! I just realized something after I read this dream. Now I know why that dream occurred. Lucifer was jealous. It was before this dream, I had one of those dreams that you are not actually dreaming...but you're there. I don't like to use the word lucid...as it doesn't really fit. It's deeper than lucid, has nothing to do with this world. (but not exactly as, it has everything to do with this world, as well, hahaha)+! This is the dream I had!!!
I wanted to visit Satan, you know, to say "hi, and thank you" (without speaking of course) for the help he'd been giving. And I was wanting to keep it as private as can be so that no one else knows about it. (But I suppose 'someone' found out). There was this deep place where it was like a large basement. Everything was black and greyish like, quite dim light, and very still and quiet...so peaceful, so nice. There was what appeared to be a smoky substance floating on the ground about a foot or two thick or deep. There were some pillars around the place, and I saw Satan in the middle, in soft grey moisturous dewy-like light, hazy I think is the right word, and he was holding up the main structure by himself, the living pillar, with his two arms up, standing there, holding the place up. I saw that from the tip of the dream, and when I saw a pillar over there, I crept out of the black dark, ever silently, and hid, standing behind the pillar which was in the dark grey area of the place. I didn't know there were so many bugs on the ground hahaha because of the mist or smoke that hovered over it. So as I stepped into the dream and stood behind the pillar, the smoke moved away from me in a circle and I could see all the bugs. I let them crawl up my body on my lower legs area, up to the knees because they were so loving and dear, and they also recognized me and loved me, so they were so respectful they didn't want to attack like I was a stranger, nor to crawl too high, or fast!, because all they wanted to do was to show me love. And I smiled at them. And then I looked out from the side of the pillar, and I saw Satan looking at me and smiling, and I smiled to him in return. It was so nice to be with such a grand friend. There was nothing like it, seeing him, struggling like that, just to help me. Of course this help I asked of Satan and Belz, was only between us. Lucifer was not to find out about it. Because we were working in unison and so it had to stay very secret. So I stopped smiling... and looking around, after I took one last look at the smoky grey and dark place, then I left it, and the dream.
And now, I realize, Lucifer did find out about it, and that's why he had those spiders hanging over my head, and that's why when I walked out of that room, I saw a skinny old man, who I knew, or thought to be, Satan, standing there against a pillar, immediately at that moment I stepped out, and had been and kept on crying and crying as I walked on. There you go. He was jealous. Hahahaa! Yea, it all comes back to me. I remember waking up from that dream and thinking that Lucifer had found out about my visit to Satan. Right. That changed everything.]
1:02Am
Oh and then there was this other dream. A big fat sideways number 8, up on the wall near the ceiling above some alcove, what it was I don't know, a bar, a coat check. Yes that would be it. A coat check. It was right at the door, the double glass doors, the entrance...or side entrance, to a large hall, which looked like a music hall, or a theatre, with all those old fashioned swirls and twirls, like they put in those cathedrals. So I must have just come in, or I .... popped in. Because that's all I remember. Standing there, then turning around to look, and seeing the large black sideways number 8. And it was like looking at me, but then I noticed the outline of the body...it was a spider. A beautiful black spider. So geometrically placed, and so comforting. I went into that back room, the hall, to look at the wonder of it all. I just stood there, stared, in amazement at the beauty. I could see like a hole in the super tall dome-shaped ceiling, and it looked like a hole that opened up to the deep blue and black sky with diamond stars twinkling in it. Then I saw it close and it was, just the ceiling.
On the other side of the place was a bar room area. And that's where I slowly walked and was headed. They had this nice lounge like you'd find at a fine theatre, but it was turned into a regular high-class bar on the days there were no performances. I knew before I walked into the room who was there, and I didn't like it, but there weren't going to be any words....alright, not much. So I heard those boisterous gangsta like fellows sitting sprawled on the white leather chairs, and I heard their voices speaking things they should never be speaking out loud, to begin with. Anyway...that's the other dream with that figure, the spider...hahaha.
Like this here movie, which I inserted on May 27th of 2015, on a Wednesday in an hour ungodly...3:36am....this poetry speaks to me, of that picture I saw when I walked in, or, sorry, popped in, hahahaha, like Mary Poppins! So I saw that black sideways "8" and now in this video, I'm seeing a large black sideways "8" that reminded me of that dream. That's why I put it in here. It seems to be, dreamssss........live on..............................................................................
But let's keep writing those dreams out. There's so much more to share.
...............
Deeper and deeper
into the big black pit. The other side.
Ok, this wasn't a dream. It happened in my waking hours. For a long time I had them spirits telling me to face him, face him. But I could never get around to it seeing the complexity of it all, so I didn't bother. But then, one day, I thought hey, this could be good for my health. Ok, so I said I'll face him. But I wasn't going to do this straight. So I bought myself some white mountain peak powder, and a couple different bottles of whiskey. Thank god I had the whiskey. Oh and, maybe I also had some green too, but I don't really remember that part because the whiskey was perrrfectly good enough.
Ok, so I did a bunch of lines upstairs sprawled on my bed, just meditating. I kept doing the lines but nothing was happening. So I started hahaha communicating with those demons in my wooden wall. Hahaha. They were hilarious. I was tormenting them. But I was glad they were there. I was being tormented. I was sooo tormented that I started complaining about him not showing up when I told him I'd be here, and geez louieez I didn't intend to leave with nothing. That's when he showed up. It was like that dream upstairs, where I looked into the concave ceiling and saw the sky above it. I saw through a stargate in my brick wall next to one of the sides of my bed, into his world, and then I appeared there. I was in the back, in the garden, and there were two of them, tall ones, standing in the back porch area, talking. It was like I interrupted them. But I did, really. So we started talking a little bit, but not much. Then I left.
So now I sat upon my bed looking into the turned off t.v. set, into the blackness of it, seeing pictures. The more I looked the more I saw. But as I was looking, suddenly there, in the bright daylight, I noticed a dark shadow at my little octagonal window...like it blocked out the light. So I looked, and I saw this super black shadow, like water almost with a life to itself the way it moved, I saw it creeping along the side of my t.v. It was so cool! Beautifully black too. So....it was delicate. Oh my, this beasts tail was wrapped under it, it was so careful as to how it moved, beautifully. So I watched at times out of the corner of my eyes, so as not to scare it, nor to scare myself either, hahahaha....but I watched, and it moved. And then when it was all over the t.v. like a frame around it, it turned and went on my brick wall, as I was speaking earlier. And this thing I saw... was a black fuzzy looking thing in the frame of a circle. So only what was showing through that circle, I could see. I looked at it, and it had a bend, like you bend a knee. And I looked? It was a HHHUUUGGGEEE spider. I could only see its black fuzzy knee....not sure what that means...but yea, I saw a part of its leg! So that shocked the hell out of me. But I'm still trying to put it together because , well because...... I just don't get it. How could Seven be a spider?
The time has come for better things.
Let's have some music to brighten up this place. There's always a light at the end of the tunnel.
Cryptorchid
The Song Remains the Same
even though everything else has changed.
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