You can have such a passionate, healthy existence! Just by following what ya want. You don't have to follow anyone else. Don't matter what they say or what they do, you don't have to follow them. Just follow what you want. A point of attraction.
A point of attraction is defined as some physical container that is conscious.
No two physical objects or energies can occupy the same place at the same time. Therefore, all conscious viewpoints perceive differently and have unique points of view.
Why would one point of attraction be attracted to another point of attraction so strongly that they can not put out of their mind that point of attraction? Maybe they are interlaced to make one big point of attraction, haha, ever thought of that? And by not allowing yourself to want what you want, you keep yourself from growing, from living, from enjoying your existence to the fullest.
Now I'm not talking about a passing fling. For were I, then I would be talking about two points of attraction which pass in the night without much thought so that neither of them remember the other that greatly. Haha. What I am talking about, is, what is that inside of you, hidden so, for so long, and yet, not so hidden at all, as, I can see it in you. When you focus on what you want, you expand your existence. This is a vibrational universe. Vibrations. Sense organs sense vibrations.
Stop pretending that punishing yourself is a good thing. Punishment is irrational and psychotic, and leads to exacerbation of the condition that is being punished.
You, this perfect universe, and all you're doing is punishing yourself. For what?
Perhaps what you want IS the answer, and that would end all your self-punishments, and you would stop being overly self-centered because you have to keep what you want secret...and that gives no time to pursue what you want. So, what you, what you, what you wAnt? I can help you get it. Just let me know, and I'll do everything in my power to help you get it.
Forget everyone else. What you want?
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